Awake

13 08 2008

“I can hardly remember the last time I felt like I do, you’re an angel disguised”

This is what I want. Intensity. Passion. Just listen to his voice, listen to the harmonies. Listen to that guitar. You cant tell me anything that beats a man, filled with passion, passion that you have inspired, singing and playing a song just for you. Intensity like that is hard to find. I would hold on to it if I did.

“I’ll give you my heart on a string”

If there was ever a time I could remember such intensity. Such want. I think I’ve felt it before, but now it just feels fake. Was it the music? Was it those moments? I cant even remember anymore, its been far too long.

“I’m trying real hard not to shake, I’m biting my tongue. But I’m feeling alive. And with every breath that I take, I feel like I’ve won.”

Remember that feeling? That nervousness of being with someone for the first, second, or third time? You are so unsure of yourself. So unsteady. Because feeling his heart beat makes you tremble. And the butterflies are flying, out of control. One of the best highs in the world.

“If its a hero you want I can save you, just stay here.”

Be my hero. Save me from what it is I have become. The life that I am living. I need a hero. Ride in on your white horse and right my wrongs. You have that inside of you.

“Say my name, I just want to hear you, so I know its true.”

Whisper in my ear. That will take it one step over that already scary edge. Just say it. Say you want me.

“Just say, that you’ll stay awake for me, I don’t want to miss anything.’

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16 responses

13 08 2008
Zoeyjane

All I can say is awwwwww.

13 08 2008
Huckdoll

Oh man. Tears, for real.

That song, your words. Wow.

14 08 2008
Hockeyman

Damn…..

14 08 2008
Amy

Awwww. I have those same longings, girl.

14 08 2008
Cricky

It’s very rare to ever find that feeling. Maintaining that feeling throughout your relationship is even harder. I pray that one day I will find that feeling again.

14 08 2008
Colleen - Mommy Always Wins

Geez…its been forever since I’ve had any of that…but I’m lucky in that I remember it well…

14 08 2008
bosssanders

I’ll be your prince-ass. Where should I park my horse? (Hugs)

14 08 2008
CableGirl

Ah, the intensity and passion of early relationships. Man, I miss that.

Nice commentary.

14 08 2008
Red Lotus Mama

*wimper* That was beautiful. The magic does disappear over the years (especially when you add kids into the mix) and it is so hard to remember how it used to work. *hug*

14 08 2008
VDog

Is THAT why chicks dig musicians? huh.

And is this that Emo stuff you kids keep talking about? ;)

Seriously though, it’s great to fall in love and have that passion, but the real juicy stuff, and the hard part, comes later – when you have to keep that passion alive after 5 yrs or 10 yrs.
Not to be a buzzkill or anything.

I hope you find what you’re looking for, lovey.

14 08 2008
Karen MEG (Pomtini)

A very pretty song. I wish my guy could sing. So does he. But alas, he can’t. I do love him enough to put up with his karoake though :)

Well, we had that passion once. The amazing part is that I still remember it; and it is a wonderful, wonderful memory. That intensity, well it is just Impossible to maintain after so many years, but nevertheless a very cherished time in our lives. Now an occasional look, a touch, a spoken “I love you” can bring the memories back. Mullets and all ;)

I hope you feel this again Miss. I really, really do.

16 08 2008
Sarah

<3 you. We should email more often.

16 08 2008
Sarah

TOTALLY STALKERISH: JUST A WARNING.

1. DIdn’t know you sold Avon.
2. Obsesses over TV on DVD, too.
3. Puffy hearts Applebee’s, too.
4. I want a big family, too; very few people know that.
5. I hate ants and small flying bugs, too. Ick ick ick ick ick!
6. I hate socks, which is kinda like you hating real shoes. ;)
7. I prefer black pens over blue, but since work uses black, I like to use blue to show “MY” work on top of their work.
8. Inside jokes are the bomb, let’s make up one just for shits & giggles.

Yeah, I just got around to reading your 100. I’m sorry. I’m a lame internet friend like that. Love you, girl!

17 08 2008
Maggie's Mind

Aw, very sweet. Makes me miss my man. I’ve found a keeper, and I feel blessed beyond words.

17 08 2008
zdoodlebub

That song (and your words) perfectly captures a moment in time. It’s many moments like that, the highs and the lows and the stress and the calm, that make it all worth it.

And I know you already know that. So the reason you are feeling this right now and not later in your relationship…your soul might be telling you something, that there might be more out there for you.

I can see I’m not alone among the comments saying that those early highs don’t last forever. But if they did, my house would be a shambles, my kids would be feral and…how would my husband hold down a job?

18 08 2008
dlyn

Interesting post. After being married for 32 years though, I can tell you that there are far better things than that high. The high was good, don’t get me wrong, but sticking it out through the lows is way better.

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